What matters is..

Really, it doesn’t matters to me that people said that ever since i have a child, i changed. Who doesn’t changed?

Only mothers will truly understand and feel what a mother is going through (though there are exceptions in this world) Now that i have become a mom, i have also learnt to judge comments and sanitise them to be a happy mom so that i can raise happy kids.  I may have worked blindly before, but i will never love blindly. My son is a precious gift to me and i really love him. Only his opinons and image of me is the most important, of course along side with my hubby’s. 🙂

Ever since KD was born, i have heard:

– A male acquaintance whom is a divorcee without a child, posted on my facebook and comment that I love my child too much.. he pities him very much when he grows up. (-_-“”” which parent doesn’t love and enjoy their newborn?? and how does that equates to my child being very pitiful next time? i wanted to reply no wonder he is a divorcee but of cos, being the very nice me, i just simply ignore it)

– A girlfriend of 10+ years that recently ROMed revealed to me that they thought it was scary.. they were afraid if i could be having post-natal depression cos every time if there is a gathering, i will said i can’t make it cause i am staying in the west now and their gatherings are usually in the north-east and on week days.. I will tell them sorry i still gotta rush back to pick up my son from the childcare (which is the truth too ma). They thought i am too obsess with my son. (lol! i told her i selectively join the gatherings cos we have all grown up and apart. not joining those gatherings doesn’t mean i didn’t meet up with a few whom i treasured and is truly close to my heart ma.. maybe i can say that, i simply do not want to waste time on certain people that do not waste time on me too?)

– A married mom ex colleague manager in another department said that “Oh! She has lost her focus cos she has become a mom now, she can’t concentrate cos she is missing her child every day she is working..”

– When i just returned to work after my maternity leave, i did faced a lot of challenges from fellow colleagues.. In sales department any where, most sales people are very competitive and can be very bitchy.. Just because i was a few months away, the person whom was hired temporary to cover me wanted to take over me already! Haha.. and of cos i will never forget those sarcastic remarks and “challenges” .. that was really uncalled for and i wanted to tell her then that, what comes around goes around.. i may still be plump then but i will slim down. i may have become a mom, but i not only grew to become more knowledgeable and experienced, i also become more stable and matured. i don’t see why i will lose out, but it’s just whether i choose what i want. 🙂 (She was many years my senior and also not yet married too)

And of cos there are more instances even from closest family members or strangers, commenting on my methods of parenting and etc. I won’t be bothered to explain myself like i will did if i were much younger and still single..

When i had my premature labour at 32 weeks and was facing it alone as hubby wasn’t around.. i realised how STUPID i ever was in leading my life! Thank god the labour was under control and the baby was not born premature! It’s truly a wake up call and made me realised what’s really important to me in my life, at every moment! i am grateful that it’s not a painful lesson but something that showed me “Look girl… how do you want to lead your life?”

Every moms will definitely faced many kinds of sucky and angry situations where people tried to teach you, criticises you and put you down all the way to hell… usually theses remarks are from people whom are not yet a mom or from the older generation. They have forgotten that they do not have ample experiences as well as they should give the new mom a chance to learn to be a mom. With a pinch of salt, take it as amusement and move on to more important things…

there are way better things in life! 🙂

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2 thoughts on “What matters is..

  1. Miracule Post author

    Hi Joshlyn,

    thanks for dropping by my blog and sharing your link. 🙂 sometimes i falls into the whatever works trap too.. and u are right indeed. there is nothing wrong with it.. many caregivers be it grandparents, nannies or even teachers in childcares uses the most convenient method too! and thus i always console myself that, mothers is still the best caregiver cos no matter how convenient we can be, we will still pull ourselves back somehow and with love, we are already giving them the best. 🙂

    Reply

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